Tell me when it’s over…

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Well I have to say after spending some time today playing catch up on a dear friends blog it has inspired me as well as shamed me. I have been so lazy about my own. So I thought it was time for a yearly update.

As most of you know life as a way of taking everything you desire to do and achieve and tossing a monkey wrench right in the middle. I do believe this is the year of the “OH NO YOU DIDN’T”. Sigh.. really..

Yes this coming May it will have been two years… count them TWO beautiful years that I left Wal-Mart. No looking back.. I do however find myself spending more time there now then I ever did when I worked there! I know right! To back track a bit… my teenage daughter works there now as of all things a cashier! LOL She knows the pain I endured for 10 years there now. She will tell me I do not know how you did it and not hurt someone. Hahahahaha yes the struggle was real people!

This job as been good for her in some ways. Yes she likes the money.. and has been saving because she wanted to make a nice Christmas for everyone this year. (She really is a good kid). She has been tossed out there in the working world learning lessons we all need to be taught.. Life is not fair and that you can not control anyone’s actions other then your own. How you choose to react to rude and hateful people is the only choice you have. You have to abide by what your boss wants even if you know better.

thI think the biggest change… yes she is driving or shall I say was driving.. uggg what did I do wrong to be punished… No don’t answer that.. I kid you not.. she no more then had her license two days.. TWO DAYS when she almost took out the Sonic sign. She put a nice long dent and yellow streak right down the front of my beloved Doreen. I was crushed.. The pole is still standing although they often keep that stall closed so maybe she did do massive damage.. I did not act gracefully about the whole thing.. there have been tons of promises of “I’ll pay for it mom”. Still there.. sigh. She use to drive my Doreen back and forth to work.. I am okay with that.. I even let her take it to go visit friends and go out to eat. See I am a good mom!

Not two weeks later she and a girlfriend where going to a youth meeting at one of the local churches. I was fine with letting her take the hubs car. It had been raining like cats and dogs all day. Massive rain. While she was gone we decided to take a trip to Walmart of all places to pick up a few things we needed and passed said church. Guess what our Escalade was not there. We rode around the parking lot several times just to make sure we were not blind from old age… nope not there.. that little brat had fibbed to us and we were planning on busting her when she got home. I for saw a grounding in her future. All we could do was wait until she got home. I hate it when she calls me late at night I hate it..I know she has gotten into some sort of trouble.. my heart sinks.. the phone is ringing and she is in tears. Her father is trying to calm her down and not doing a very good job at it. She is stranded on some back country road.. she is in a ditch. She does not know where she is. I take a deep breath.. her getting lost is not a new thing here just saying.. So hubs and I take up trying to pin point there they could be. We only had very little clues as to where they were. It is still pouring down rain.. no street lights.. we sort of get close.. which is amazing if you think about it. When we get to the area.. we are met by two cop cars and another parent. My truck is not 4 wheel drive so I could go no further.. They were trying to find them out there in the middle of the night.. several hours later and frantic calls a local fireman found them and drove out to fetch them. Sigh our car was in a ditch. I am grateful she went the way she did. If she had gone the other way she would have ended up in a water filled riven. So yes in case you were wondering.. she and her friends were fine..and yes massive punishment was due. We may have went over board.. but dang it it was all too much.. she got 6 months.. to sit home and think about what she had done and why she even went down into a place she did not know in the pouring rain. (Side note. She ended up in Braums Dairy land. Their back fields on a path of dirt not meant for a huge vehicle.) We had to get the car towed the next day once we found it ourselves.. sigh

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This six months was unbearable for her and us and she tried to wear us down each and every day.. but we held strong.. that is until life tosses us a monkey wrench…. My dear husband had not been feeling well and the stress from our dear daughters antics did not help. After weeks of a nagging cough and pain in his chest every time he coughed I made him go to see our dear friend Doctor Jim.

Jim took a chest x-ray and comes back to tel us he has Phenomena. Placed him on meds and sent him home. Two weeks later he was no better so we go back.. another x-ray and he comes in shaking his head. No worse yet no better wants to send him for a Chest scan.. Appointment made and we sit and wait. We know this is never a good thing.. we waited all weekend and part of the next week.. get called into his office. We have braced ourselves and someone who shall remain nameless took to looking things up on the internet (HUGE mistake by the way).

Once in his office he tells us the results are in and they believe it is Lymphoma. He wants to send us to the Oncologist to have him take a look at it.. appointment made.. we go to his office see and talk to him.. he looks at the scan and agrees with the other two Lymphoma just not sure what type.. he wants to go into the chest and get a biopsy. Appointment made.. we go in and meet with the doctor.. she is very nice set up the time and place to get this done. We show up when we were suppose too. I waited for it to be over and an hour later she come out to find me. She tells me that it is not Lymphoma.. but inoperable lung cancer that had spread.. WHAT!!!! WOW okay so now I’ve got to wrack my brain about what I need to do. I have a very sick spouse.. a child who has no idea what we have been dealing with for the last month or so.. and sick elderly in-laws who have been in the hospital themselves.. no life insurance.. me not working.. the stress was unreal.

We now had to decide how to tell the people we love what we were dealing with. Not an easy thing to do or hear.. We tried for a long while to keep it from his folks but they knew something was not right. My child was another story. We knew she was going to be scared and hurt and was going to need the new friends she was no longer able to visit or even talk to on the phone to help her deal with this. SO we caved and let her start hanging out with her friends. We honestly felt it was the right thing to do. We waited for our next appointment to see where we went from here.. a week passed.. the day before we were to go see his oncologist we get a call from the doctor who preformed the biopsy. She started out by saying “I wanted to be the first to call you as soon as I knew.. he does not have lung cancer.. he has Sarcoidosis” Then went on to explain it to me as a disease that causes your immune system to overreact, which can lead to health issues. It can cause lung damage, skin rashes, and eye disease and can affect other organs of the body.

Okay praise God.. now where do we go from here.. set up yet another appointment with her where she put him on 50mg of prednisone which is enough to choke a horse! In my husband it produces nasty after taste that he has all day everyday. He also has hot flashes.. it can be 30 out side and he is burning up. But hey he is cancer free praise the Lord. I will take that diagnoses every day all day. So a huge weight was lifted off our shoulders and I mean huge. It makes everyday more special and wonderful. I never want to take him for granted.

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Ummm yes about my daughter.. well now that she was off her punishment I do not think we could very well take it back and place her on it again right? LOL Well never fear knowing her as I do I knew it would only be a matter of hours before she did something to be placed back on the naughty list.. Truer words have never been spoken! Sigh. It did not take her long to be nasty and that teenage tude take over.. she was short and rude and just a big ole turkey butt.. After weeks of this we had had it.

She asked of she could take my Doreen about 24 miles away to go see her boyfriend. I was not crazy about the idea or him but I allowed it. Now she has never been one to put aside fun for common sense.. It had started to rain hard and I mean hard.. so instead of saying wow it is going to start raining hard I had better get back home before it gets dark and I can not see.. once more no lights on these country roads.. no she was having fun and chose to just stay until it was close to her deadline to get home… The dreaded phone call.. (see I told you no good can come from it.) She is crying..You seeing a trend here? Anyway she could not see where she was going because of the rain.. so she was going slow when someone came up behind her and side swiped Doreen. Kill me now! Bent the bumper busted out the taillight and went right up the side of my truck and smashed it in.. sigh . No the jerk did not stop he just took off.. she was scared as I think we would all be.. so instead of calling the police she turned around and headed back to her boyfriends house and called us. She re-fractured her clavicle and is missing a little work to heal but otherwise she is fine.. mostly.. okay somewhat!  Read on..

We did not use insurance because it was around 10K of damage and they wanted to claims it out. Yes they would send me a check but then I would in turn just have to give it to the bank to pay it off and then I’d have no money for another truck. Yes it is driveable.. mostly cosmetic. We still have to get the tail light fixed but then it is just gonna be done a little at a time. Sigh..

So are you shocked that with the nasty tude she has been spouting and the lack of common sense.. she is not allowed to drive our cars.. and she is on restriction once more. Not because of the wreck that was not her fault.. but she is so hateful and disrespectful.. How come no one told me it was gonna be so hard raising teens?

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I personally think there should be some sort of government program that you enter once your child has turned 18 where you can relax and try to put back some sort of a normal life. Maybe new job training.. new location.. on a beach.. yeah that sounds so good.. Oh shoot hold on phones ringing… drats!

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About drell3

People who know me would say I am nuts! Crazy! Silly! Honest! Loyal! I would say they are right.. but I am so much more... I am a Mother, Wife, Daughter, Friend, Cook, I could fill up this whole page.. I love my life.. I love my husband, I love my child! My family.. you thought i was gonna say my work! LOL NOT!!! I am on a journey... I am coming into my own.. discovering, learning..I am transforming.. one day I will get my butterfly wings.
This entry was posted in Daughter, driving teenager, family, Father, frustration, Husbands, life, making the best of it, teenage tude, trusting God. Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Tell me when it’s over…

  1. coastalmom says:

    Ahhh Tracey,
    Wow! You have been through some testing.
    I first have to tell you that I will put you in the top part of my prayer list!!!! You are one strong cookie!
    I am so impressed with your strength.
    I saw that you were walking through the walls of my archives and I love you so much for it! LOL. Sometimes I go back and my stupid – forget the faith – and worry about it without giving it to the Lord – attitude creeps in and I read something I wrote about faith and think WHO wrote that? LOL. I wish I could say I live my life so faithfully! It is hard to not just remember to get on my knees every single time I need to!
    So anywaaaay, I had to catch up with you and every time I’ve ever come on your blog for ages, there has been no new posts…. And then on my phone I saw you posted something!!!! I was so happy. So I didn’t want to just “LIKE” a post like this without commenting and so I got on my computer and clicked on your name and did you know that your site doesn’t automatically pop up? You have to do something. I posted it a while ago under gravitars. But I am sure you would have a lot more followers (if you even care or want to bother) Just wanted to share that with ya!
    Anyway you poor thing. I have also gone through health stuff with my husband. He seems to have a handle on his health while I haven’t been to the Dr in about seven years. Stupid yeah… but I feel I have a method to my madness. If something is ever wrong I feel God keeps healing me. Weird… but everything goes away.
    Don’t roll your eyes. LOL.
    As for your baby…
    My niece had this on her Facebook page… It might give you some comfort
    https://www.facebook.com/OfficialLysa/
    I feel your pain. When Brooke moved to Los Angeles I hated those crying phone calls!!!! I totally know what you are talking about as I am sure half the world does! AND omg every place on her car had dents or scrapes or scratches and half actually weren’t her fault. I don’t think she is a liar so I had to believe her but she had some bad luck for about the first two year.
    Once when she was doing her fairy job where she was a fairy for kid’s birthday parties a woman in an expensive car turning left out of a parking lot finally totaled the car that had all the dents on it. And she was standing in the rain waiting for the police crying when another woman came up and said “honey do you need a witness?” So nice. Must have been a sad sight a poor fairy with wet wings and a crunched car. MY BABY!!!!! LOL.
    She also had taken my car a few times to LA and it came back with different things each time. When you go through certain scares like her standing in the middle of the street when our store collapsed during that earthquake where we lost our store… you stop valuing STUFF so much but heck it didn’t have any dents on it when it left it’s driveway! And I also remember when you got that truck! You loved it!!!! So I do understand. But I was just thankful that each call was just what they were and now she has learned to drive better than me out there in the world I am sure. But all I can say is each accident is a lesson and if they have enough of them they get the lessons early. I mean Brooke’s insurance points were almost up a few times and I was thinking…PLEEEEASE spread those tickets apart! Also, for a year she lived in a place that didn’t include parking! THAT was a nightmare. Praying every night that she’d find a safe parking lot not too far away! I am not sure how many parking tickets and towing bills we paid until we said NO MORE! And funny it stopped but she also moved from that horrible place near the Capitol Record building in Hollywood!
    Now she is married and safely tucked in with her hubby who treats her like a princess. So it does get better. Just hang in there my friend!
    I kind of felt like we were hanging out today!
    Love you lots!
    Diane
    PS my sister just got a job as a cashier at Walmart!

    • drell3 says:

      Thank you dear friend.. I love your honest advice.. and I agree.. I know it must seem I am only caring about the things gone wrong.. No really I am over joyed that my husband does not have Cancer and my child has a job and is doing so wonderful in school.. And at this point I can even find some humor in some of it.. I know the truck and the caddy don’t mean anything compared to their health and more important they know it too.. this has just been a year.. I want to thank you for being the awesome person you are.. I can always find huge nuggets of wisdom in your words! ❤ Your sister must be very brave.. she will be in my thoughts and prayers.

  2. coastalmom says:

    Just in case your interested.
    Not sure why it’s so hard to find you from your pic but I am sure that this would get more people reading your posts and following you – if you care! LOL.

    https://nostolencatpictures.com/2013/08/24/gravitar-links/

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